For a little over a year now I have been what I recently dubbed “dating myself.”
What, you may ask, do I mean by this? Well, I’m taking time to really get to know myself while many others my age are getting to know a boyfriend/girlfriend.
I’m having a lot of “me time” and going places to eat and have coffee by myself. I’m not focusing on a boyfriend right now in order to really figure out what I want as an individual (because I really have no idea yet.) I’m taking time to enjoy what I like. I’m trying new things and making new friends. I’m being a little selfish, honestly.
Mostly, I’m having a lot of fun.
I’m not waiting on texts or calls from a boy. I’m not constantly trying to plan around someone else’s schedule. I’m not sacrificing anything I want for another person. I’m not being anyone’s girlfriend with any kind of responsibility for a relationship.
I’m being me.
I don’t feel lonely or jealous when I see couples, nor do I feel resentful. Personally, I do not want or feel the need to be in a relationship at this time in my life, but many others my age think otherwise. To each be their own.
In no way do I mean to offend anyone who is in an actual relationship with another person. I have close friends who are married, engaged, or in dating relationships that extend beyond a year, and I’m happy for them. That’s what they want, and it’s not what I want. We are all happy here.
I’m mostly writing this to that person who A) is perpetually single for the meantime, B) just got out of a relationship, or C) is like myself and needed a term to coin their “status.” To the A person, you go! Take this time for some self-discovery and own it. To the B person, welcome. Maybe you’re not entirely happy that you and your significant other are no longer… er… significant (?), but maybe you need some time to reevaluate and prioritize what you are seeking in life. Being with someone else a lot can and does change you/your goals.
And to the C person, you already know how sweet dating yourself is, and you’re probably reading this during your coffee date for one.
Special thanks to my friend, Kellie, for listening to me talk about my opinion of dating one’s self and supporting it. More time with your friends is just another perk of dating yourself.